Chapter 65 — The Vidyadhari Explains Her Frustration and Prays to Vasishta

The vidyadhari continues speaking to Vasishta:—

After the lapse of a long time, I found my passions diminishing and I grew as detached to my susceptibilities as tender greens become juiceless and dry after autumn is over. Seeing my husband grown old and divested of all his receptivity and vigor, sitting quietly in his steadfast tapas with an unwavering mind, I thought my life is useless to me. I thought that early widowhood, even premature death or rather a lingering disease or lasting misery is preferable to a woman living without a loving husband.

It is the blessing of life and a woman’s greatest good fortune to have a young and loving husband who is of good and pleasant temperament and yielding in his manners. A woman is given for lost who does not have a sweet and lovely spouse, just as understanding is lost when it is not filled with learning. Prosperity is in vain when she favors the wicked, and a woman lost to shame is in vain. She is the best of women who is obedient to her husband. That is the best fortune which falls into the hands of the virtuous and good. That understanding is praised which is clear and ample, and that goodness is good which has a fellow feeling and equal regard for all mankind.

Neither disease nor calamity, nor dangers or difficulties can disturb the minds or afflict the hearts of a loving pair. The prospect of the blossoming pleasure garden of Nandana and the flowery paths of paradise appear like a desert land to women who have no husbands, or husbands who are wicked and rude in their behavior. A woman may forsake all her worldly possessions as having little value to her, but she can never forsake her husband, even for any fault on his part.

10 O chief of sages, you see all these miseries to which I have been subject these very many years of my puberty. 11 But all this fondness of mine is gradually turning to indifference. I am pining and fading away as fast as a frost beaten lotus flower shrinks and shrivels for lack of its sap. 12 Being now indifferent to the pleasure of my enjoyment of all things, I come to seek the bliss of my nirvana. I stand in need of your advice for my salvation. 13 Otherwise, for those unsuccessful in desires and ever restless and perplexed in their minds, buffeting and carried by the waves of deadly troubles, it is better to die than live in this world.

14 My husband, desirous of obtaining his nirvana, is now intent day and night upon subduing his mind by the light of his reason, just as a king is roused to conquer his foe in company with his princes. 15 Now sage, please dispel both his as well as my ignorance by your reasonable advice which may revive our memory of the soul. 16 My lord meditating solely on the soul, without my company or any thought about me, has created an indifference in me and a complete distaste for all worldly things.

17 I am now set free from the influence of worldly desires. I have equipped myself with the Khechari Mudra magic charm whereby I am able to fly through the air. 18 I have acquired the power of flight by means of this magic charm, and it is by virtue of this power that I am able to associate with spiritual masters and converse with you. 19 Having equipped myself with this magic charm, I have acquired the power to see all past and future events even though I remain in my house on earth, which is the basis and center of all the worlds.

20 Having seen within my mind everything relating to this world, I have come to survey the outer world. I have seen as far as gigantic Lokaloka Mountain. 21 Before this, O sage, neither I nor my husband ever had any desire to see anything beyond our own home. 22 My husband, completely occupied with meditating on the meanings of the Vedas, has no desire whatever to know anything relating to the past or future. 23 For this reason my lord has not been able to succeed to any station in life. It is only today that both of us desire to be blessed with the best state of humanity.

24 Therefore we ask you, O venerable sage, to grant our request, as it is never in the nature of noble persons to refuse the prayer of their suppliants. 25 I have been wandering in the ethereal regions among hosts of perfected spiritual masters. I have not found anyone except you, O honorable sage, who may burn the thick gloom of ignorance. 26 The nature of good people is to do good to others, even without knowing the reason to have pity for their suppliants. So you, O venerable sage, should not refuse the petition of your suppliant.